ESFP - ENTP Relationship

ESFP - ENTP Relationship

Joys and Struggles

This section ESFP - ENTP relationship is about how these two personality types come together in a relationship. Specifically, we will be looking at the joys of this relationship as well as the struggles this relationship may have.

The ESFP - ENTP relationship has 2 preference similarities and 2 preference differences. Regardless of the number of similarities and differences, each personality combination will have its unique set of challenges. We will look at each of the 4 preferences individually:

Extroversion-Extroversion

Joys Struggles
  • Because both parties enjoy people, they are likely to go for many socializing activities and parties together.
  • They will likely enjoy each other’s energy and zest for life and have many fun activities and adventures together.
  • Because of their love for people and socializing, they are likely to have a large network around them, supporting and mediating for the couple in time of need.
  • Because both love to speak, (not so much listen), they may try to compete for air time when conversing with one another. So instead of listening, they may out talk each other in order to be heard.
  • Hence, they may not feel fulfilled, especially if one party is always doing the talking and the other doing the listening.
  • One party may turn to outside friends to fill that desire to speak and be heard, and in bad cases, it may lead to extra-marital affair.

Sensing-Intuition

Joys Struggles
  • Sensors enjoys the insightful and brilliant Intuitive and seeing things from a big picture, strategic perspective relative to theirs.
  • Sensors are also likely fascinated by the outlandish imagination of the Intuitive; with big dreams and visions.
  • Intuitives will appreciate the Sensors attention to detail in everyday living; Sensors bring Intuitives down to earth to common sense.
  • While not true for all Sensors, Sensors dress themselves and groom themselves relatively well; this is something that Intuitives will appreciate and admire.
  • May find it a challenge to have a common topic for discussion; Sensors enjoy talking about everyday happenings while Intuitive enjoys ideas, trends and theories. These differences in interest may mean the couple may find little or no chemistry.
  • Sensors are more past and present focused while Intuitives tend to be more future oriented; This means that Sensors will take references from past experiences and present facts to make a decision, while Intuitives are more likely to take into account future possibilities when doing so. – This may lead to different conclusions with available information.
  • Sensors may find Intuitives’ lack of interest in everyday living and managing household tasks to be frustrating; they don’t understand why Intuitives are always ‘in their heads’, pondering about the deep things of life while they are the ones taking care of the duties of the household.

Thinking-Feeling

Joys Struggles
  • Thinker will be attracted to the Feeler’s compassion and warmth toward Thinker and others, which Thinker may find lacking in self.
  • Feeler is attracted to the objective, tough-minded Thinker who can take and give criticism without taking offense.
  • The Thinker-Feeler partnership will provide all rounded perspectives, considering people, values and logical consequences when making important decisions.
  • Thinkers may hurt Feelers with their straightforward and sometimes tactless words; Feelers tend to take words personally; so when the Thinker provides negative feedback, it always evokes a larger than expected reaction from the Feeler.
  • Thinkers may not understand the Feeler’s desire for harmony and hence avoidance of conflict. Thinkers often misinterpret Feeler’s behavior and deem them complicated.
  • Feelers also tend to show affection much more naturally and sometimes they may feel their Thinking counterparts don’t show enough of it; they may feel unfulfilled in the relationship.

Perceiving-Perceiving

Joys Struggles
  • Both parties enjoy being spontaneous to changing circumstances and keeping their options open without seeing the need to come to a decision.
  • Both tend to be okay with going with the flow; for the most part, daily decisions like eating locations or recreational activities are decided on a whim. Little conflict over these issues.
  • Both parties are comfortable with disorganization in the household; the household will probably be messy, and both are perfectly fine with it.
  • Both parties tend to be less consistent in performing routine household tasks like cleaning the house, doing the laundry and paying the bills.
  • However, since these activities are a necessary evil, the partner that tries to do these tasks consistently may feel frustrated and maybe resentful.
  • Also, because both parties want to keep their options open, they are likely to procrastinate making important decisions, sometimes even pushing it away until they make none.

 

Here’s how ESFPs and ENTPs can relate to each other better:

Reaching out to the ESFP as an ENTP
  • Let your partner express feelings – Refrain from dominating a conversation; but get your partner into the conversation by asking caring questions. 
  • Explain things in real terms Theory and big ideas confuse your partner. Explain things in concrete and specific terms. Demonstrate if possible. 
  • Give specific instructions When you give instructions, avoid giving the big picture strategy and expecting your partner to figure out the details. Give specific instructions like to-dos or actionable steps. 
  • Be positive and light-hearted – Your partner works best in a positive, warm and light-hearted atmosphere. Adopt a partnerly and energetic tone when engaging your partner. 
  • Give options – Your partner does not like to feel tied down or committed to anything he/she doesn’t want. Give your partner options and the freedom to choose.
Reaching out to the ENTJ as an ESTP
  • Show support for his/her many ideas – Listen enthusiastically and supportively to your partner when he or she shares his or her many ideas, innovations and suggestions, even if you don’t get him/her right away. 
  • Learn to look at the big picture – When analysing issues, try to step back and look at the big picture. Ask your partner to point out potential implications that you may not tell right away. 
  • Try not to be passive aggressive – If you disagree with something, voice out your feelings from the start. Don’t bottle it in with resentment and saying spiteful words when things do not work out. 
  • Never question your partner’s competence – Never doubt your partner’s capability or undermine him or her in public. Being an achiever is something that he or she usually takes pride in. 
  • Take time to organise your thoughts – Before you confront or clarify certain things with your partner, spend some time alone to organise and collect your thoughts. You will feel prepared to effectively and calmly argue your position.

This is a summary of the joys and pains of the ESFP – ENTP relationship.

However, personality dynamics are more complex than this. It does not just extend to the difference or similarity in individual preferences but goes deeper than that.