INFP – ENTJ Relationship

Joys and Struggles

This section INFP - ENTJ relationship is about how these two personality types come together in a relationship. Specifically, we will be looking at the joys of this relationship as well as the struggles this relationship may have.

The INFP - ENTJ relationship has 1 preference similarity and 3 preference differences. Regardless of the number of similarities and differences, each personality combination will have its unique set of challenges. We will look at each of the 4 preferences individually:

Extroversion-Introversion

Joys

Struggles

Are attracted by each other’s difference in energy levels. Extroverts appreciate the calm and steady demeanor of the Introvert, while Introverts enjoy the hearty and bubbly Extrovert. Extrovert enjoys that there is an active listening ear in the Introvert, always ready to listen to his thoughts and rants. Introvert enjoys that the Extrovert takes social leadership in most occasions, connecting them to new friends and people that they otherwise would be too shy to approach.

Extroverts, however, may find that the Introvert is too quiet and communicates too little with nothing to share. They may feel Introverts are boring, or just disinterested in talking to them. Introverts may find that Extroverts are too loud and talk too much without listening to them. An Introvert may feel neglected and unheard by Extroverts because they will only share if asked – and Extroverts usually don’t ask. On the weekends, Extroverts enjoy heading out for social activities or other high stimulation activities to relax while Introverts prefer staying home or at the most have some quiet activity with close friends. This difference in preference will sometimes lead to dissatisfaction.

Intuition-Intuition

Joys

Struggles

Because both parties enjoy discussing big ideas, possibilities and global issues, they will usually find a certain attraction to each other. This is especially if they have similar viewpoints on certain issues, they will find chemistry with each other. Both tend to enjoy each other’s uniqueness, not just in viewpoints but also in fashion, tastes and so on. Because both parties enjoy talking about the future, their conversations will more often revolve around future hopes and dreams and exciting possibilities.

However, they may lack interest in everyday living, hence if they are a married couple, household duties may tend to be neglected. Even if they attempt to take care of household, they may still miss important details in its maintenance. The partner that has to be constantly responsible for the everyday maintenance may feel resentment or unfulfilled. A good balance can be achieved with proper delegation of duties or with the hiring of a domestic helper.

Thinking-Feeling

Joys

Struggles

Thinker will be attracted to the Feeler’s compassion and warmth toward Thinker and others, which Thinker may find lacking in self. Feeler is attracted to the objective, tough-minded Thinker who can take and give criticism without taking offense. The Thinker-Feeler partnership will provide all rounded perspectives, considering people, values and logical consequences when making important decisions.

Thinkers may hurt Feelers with their straightforward and sometimes tactless words; Feelers tend to take words personally; so when the Thinker provides negative feedback, it always evokes a larger than expected reaction from the Feeler. Thinkers may not understand the Feeler’s desire for harmony and hence avoidance of conflict. Thinkers often misinterpret Feeler’s behavior and deem them complicated. Feelers also tend to show affection much more naturally and sometimes they may feel their Thinking counterparts don’t show enough of it; they may feel unfulfilled in the relationship.

Judging-Perceiving

Joys

Struggles

Judgers enjoy making decisions for the relationship while Perceivers are happy just to let Judgers do so. Perceivers are happy to go with the flow according to the Judger’s opinions, and they are generally okay with most casual decisions. Because of their organized and scheduled nature, Judgers bring a stability and order to the otherwise messy and spontaneous lives of Perceivers – something that the Perceivers greatly appreciate. Perceivers, on the other hand, help Judgers to lighten up and see the fun side of life, bidding them to be less serious and uptight about everything – something that the Judgers know they need a reminder of.

However, Judgers find Perceivers to be too passive and casual with their indecisiveness – Sometimes this gets on the nerves of Judgers. Perceivers may find Judgers’  to be too controlling at times; they often react by pushing back because they find it too stifling to their desire for freedom. Judgers find that Perceivers care little about household organization, something which they value highly. Perceivers are likely to mess up the house because they don’t like to keep things neat and orderly (at least in the Judger’s eyes) – this of course drives Judgers crazy. Judgers may also find the Perceiver’s lack of planning and scheduling to be irritating; they may try to organize the Perceiver’s life as a result – this of course, is a mistake and something that Perceivers do not always appreciate.

 

Here’s how INFPs and ENTJs can relate to each other better:

Reaching out to the INFP as an ENTJ

Don’t expect quick answers – Ask a question and then listen patiently to your partner’s response. Don’t interject or cover the silence with more words.  Let them consider possibilities – Let your partner consider new ideas and possibilities; listen to it and refrain from being critical, but gently point out ideas for improvement.  Take care how you say it – Your straightforward approach sometimes comes across as offensive or insensitive. Adopt a partnerly, warm and encouraging tone when expressing your view.  Support your partner’s dreams – When your partner shares his/her dream with you, don’t be critical too quickly. Instead, find ways you can support them to achieve it.  Don’t rush to conclude – When you want to make a decision, don’t close it too quickly. Your partner probably needs some time to think about it before coming back to you. Give some time for openness.

Reaching out to the ENTJ as an INFP

Speak up – Your partner may tend to dominate the conversation, especially in a work context. Speak up intentionally and assert your point.  Don’t take things personally – Whatever words your partner rebuts you with, don’t take it personally. Your partner probably has the intention of getting the best results from you.  Defend your points with logic – To convince your partner, you need to defend your stand not with emotion or passion, but with logic. Explain how you arrived at certain conclusions with logical proof.  Be decisive – Don’t be wishy-washy when engaging your partner. Be decisive in your answers, even though there may be room for uncertainty.  Focus on pragmatism – Your partner is probably more interested in the effectiveness of your approach rather than how much passion you have for it. Focus on that instead.

This is a summary of the joys and pains of the INFP – ENTJ relationship.

However, personality dynamics are more complex than this. It does not just extend to the difference or similarity in individual preferences but goes deeper than that.